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Donald J Trump: "No matter who wins, at least I had fun" (The Onion)

The Onion is apparently struggling to satirize an election that is so absurd it can only be called “self-satirizing,” but they scored a hit with their op-ed by Donald J Trump: “No Matter What Happens Tomorrow, At Least I Had Fun.”

Right from the beginning, when I announced my candidacy, I stirred up all kinds of deep-seated passions with my remarks about Mexican Americans, and I still can’t help but smile every time I think back on it. That was fun. Some people condemned me, others praised me, and many spent months of their lives closely considering what I had said and attempting to determine how my words, if carried into policy, would affect millions of people. But me, I just got to say it, which was fun, and watch people react to it, which was also fun.

And that was just the beginning, of course. I came up with a ban on Muslim immigrants. I participated in a bunch of debates. I even got to set much of the Republican Party’s 2016 platform, laying out how one of the nation’s two major parties would govern 320 million people if I were elected. Talk about a great time. Sure, coming up with policies that would impact large swaths of the population, affect every corner of our economy, and alter the direction of the nation for decades to come was an honor, but really, it was more than that: It was a fun way to pass the time. Honestly, one of the most fun things I’ve ever done.

No Matter What Happens Tomorrow, At Least I Had Fun
[Donald Trump/The Onion]


(via 3 Quarks Daily)


(Image: Donald Trump by Gage Skidmore 8, Gage Skidmore, CC-BY-SA)

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