The New York Times Gay Euphemism Generator

“ his , , he
.”

“He with .”

“His contained pictures of him and reportedly followed that of .”

“Though he is by friends, reportedly find his interest in .”

“He .”

/* Function to fetch random entry from arrays */a=function (x) { var r = [Math.floor ( Math.random() * x.length )]; return x[r];}

gays = new Array ('former Obama speechwriter Jon Lovett','newly out diver Tom Daley','TV star Jim Parsons','Star Trek star Zachary Quinto','popular actor Neil Patrick Harris','former Grey\'s Anatomy star T.R. Knight','Sean Hayes of Will and Grace fame','heartthrob Lance Bass', 'Ellen DeGeneres and Portia De Rossi','Britain\'s national treasure, Stephen Fry','a friend of singer Elton John');

// Euphemism template #1, "The Representative"

a0 = new Array ('Despite','In spite of','Notwithstanding','In regard to');a1 = new Array ('carefully-maintained','considered','clean-cut','fashionable','manicured','self-conscious','unusual','bohemian','beguiling');a2 = new Array ('appearance','vanity','vanity','smile','stubble','otherness','handsomeness','good looks','high spirits');a2b = new Array ('among those','and other','counted among');a3= new Array ('qualities','attributes','characteristics','distinctions', 'particularities','idiosyncracies','facets to his personality','aspects to his character');a4 = new Array ('that some men find','which some find');a5 = new Array ('disconcerting', 'unsettling', 'troubling', 'peculiar', 'imperious', 'affected', 'disingenuous');a6 = new Array ('prefers not talk about','prefers not to discuss', 'is guarded concerning', 'is guarded about', 'is uncomfortable with discussion of','avoids engaging the media on the subject of', 'professes disinterest in talk of');a7 = new Array ('his love life','his glamorous adventures','his private life','his single life','having never married','his relationship with his mother','his romantic attachments','rumors about whom he is dating');

// Euphemism template #2, "The Aide"

b1 = new Array ('showed up at','was seen at','reportedly was seen at','was spotted at','was spied at'); b2 = new Array ('a party','a game show audience test','a play','an opera performance','a fashion show','an Adam Lambert concert','a broadway musicals','an opera recital','a London club','a beach in Rio de Janeiro','a San Francisco café');

// Euphemism template #3, "The Senator"

c1 = new Array ('Instagram','Twitter','Facebook');c2 = new Array ('account','page','blog','site','feed');c3 = new Array ('lifting weighs at the gym','attending the opera','flexing his muscles','listening to classical music');

// Euphemism template #2, "The Adventurer"

d0 = new Array ('considered','thought to be','regarded as','believed to be','noted as');d1 = new Array ('adventurous', 'an aesthete','artistic','decadent','charming','hedonistic','untraditional','an exceptional singer');d2 = new Array ('others around him','members of his family','colleagues');d3 = new Array ('dance','chess','fashion','the decorative arts','the arts','classical music','Caravaggio','European cinema','British culture','the works of Derek Jarman');d4 = new Array ('excessive','overbearing','unnerving','unsettling','disconcerting'); // to

// Euphemism template #2, "The Classic"

e1 = new Array ('had a fiancée, but she died') // pre name

document.getElementById("a0").innerHTML = a(a0);document.getElementById("a1").innerHTML = a(a1);document.getElementById("a2").innerHTML = a(a2);document.getElementById("a2b").innerHTML = a(a2b);document.getElementById("a3").innerHTML = a(a3);document.getElementById("a4").innerHTML = a(a4);document.getElementById("a5").innerHTML = a(a5);document.getElementById("a6").innerHTML = a(a6);document.getElementById("a7").innerHTML = a(a7);document.getElementById("b1").innerHTML = a(b1);document.getElementById("b2").innerHTML = a(b2);document.getElementById("c1").innerHTML = a(c1);document.getElementById("c2").innerHTML = a(c2);document.getElementById("c3").innerHTML = a(c3);document.getElementById("d0").innerHTML = a(d0);document.getElementById("d1").innerHTML = a(d1);document.getElementById("d2").innerHTML = a(d2);document.getElementById("d3").innerHTML = a(d3);document.getElementById("d4").innerHTML = a(d4);document.getElementById("e1").innerHTML = a(e1);document.getElementById("aGay1").innerHTML = a(gays);document.getElementById("aGay2").innerHTML = a(gays);

/* Function to keep all the paragraphs but one hidden*/

var para = [Math.floor ( Math.random() * 42)];

if (para