An EU working group that’s been charged with coming up with recommendations for a terrorist-free European Internet has been brainstorming the stupidest goddamned ideas you’ve ever read, which are now widely visible, thanks to a leaked memo. The group, CleanIT, which is composed of cops, governments, and some NGOs from across Europe, has been given €400,000 to make its recommendations, and a document dated August 2012 sets out some of the group’s thinking to date. As mentioned, it’s pretty amazingly bad. Like, infra-stupid, containing strains of stupidity so low and awful they can’t be perceived with unaided human apparatus. Here’s Ars Technica’s summary of the ideas in the memo:
* “Knowingly providing hyperlinks on websites to terrorist content must be defined by law as illegal just like the terrorist content itself”
* “Governments must disseminate lists of illegal, terrorist websites”
* “The Council Regulation (EC) No 881/2002 of 27 May 2002 (art 1.2) should be explained that providing Internet services is included in providing economics instruments to Al Qaeda (and other terrorist persons and organisations designated by the EU) and therefore an illegal act”
* “On Voice over IP services it must be possible to flag users for terrorist activity.”
* “Internet companies must allow only real, common names.”
* “Social media companies must allow only real pictures of users.”
* “At the European level a browser or operating system based reporting button must be developed.”
* “Governments will start drafting legislation that will make offering… a system [to monitor Internet activity] to Internet users obligatory for browser or operating systems…as a condition of selling their products in this country or the European Union.”
Ars Technica’s Cyrus Farivar tracked down a CleanIT spokesman on his home planet. But Klaasen is the Dutch national coordinator for counterterrorism and security programme manager of the office of the Dutch national coordinator for counterterrorism and security*, and he is really upset that we can read this stupid, stupid document full of recommendations that would be illegal in European law. He also can’t believe that European Digital Rights, the NGO that published the leaked stupid, stupid document, didn’t honor the confidentiality notice on the stupid, stupid cover-page.
* Update Cyrus sez, “Klaasen has corrected his title calling himself now the ‘programme manager of the office of the Dutch national coordinator for counterterrorism and security’. Here’s his LinkedIn page. He’s referred to as the ‘project manager,’ which as far as I can tell, makes him in charge of the whole thing.”
“I do fully understand that the publishing of the document led to misunderstandings,” he told Ars. “If we publish like this, it will scare people—that’s the reason that we didn’t publish it. It’s food for thought. We do realize these are very rough ideas.”
…”You can compare [this situation] to taking pictures of what someone buys for dinner with how a dinner tastes—you don’t have the complete picture,” he added.
…”We really didn’t expect that people would publish a document that clearly says ‘not for publication’—that really surprised us,” he said. “I don’t know if it’s naive. Why can’t I trust people?” [Ed: Oh, diddums]
Proposed EU plan to stop terrorist sites even more ridiculous than it sounds
(Image: Clown, a Creative Commons Attribution Share-Alike (2.0) image from manc’s photostream)