Fond as all civilized people are of 1980s action movie "gear up" scenes, it is often noted that Mark Lester's Commando contains the genre's highest point of achievement. In the 1985 classic, Arnold Schwarzenegger's protagonist conducts an amphibious landing on a tropical beach. Unbundling his cargo, it is revealed to be an astounding collection of weapons, all of which he attaches to his person in a perfectly edited montage of exaggerated gestures and sound effects. So excellent is it that its influence was felt immediately from B-movies to arcade games — and yet it lasts but 30 seconds.
Thanks to the magic of modern technology, this shortcoming may now be rectified. The above video offers a 12-minute remix of Lester's finest hour; courtesy of Infinite Looper, it may last forever.
