On Project Gutenberg, the 1811 edition of Francis Grose’s “Dictionary in the Vulgar Tongue,” a compleat look at all the dirty cussin’ of the early 1800s. It was produced by Juliet Sutherland, Charles Franks and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team, who clearly have admirably filthy minds. Some of my favorites:
ACCOUNTS. To cast up one’s accounts; to vomit.
ADMIRAL OF THE NARROW SEAS. One who from drunkenness
vomits into the lap of the person sitting opposite to
him. SEA PHRASE.AMBASSADOR OF MOROCCO. A Shoemaker. (See Mrs.
Clarke’s Examination.)APE LEADER. An old maid; their punishment after
death, for neglecting increase and multiply, will be, it is
said, leading apes in hell.APPLE DUMPLIN SHOP. A woman’s bosom.
APPLE-PYE BED. A bed made apple-pye fashion, like what is called a turnover apple-pye, where the sheets are so doubled as to prevent any one from getting at his length between them: a common trick played by frolicsome country lasses on their sweethearts, male relations, or visitors.
ATHANASIAN WENCH, or QUICUNQUE VULT. A forward girl, ready to oblige every man that shall ask her.
BAG OF NAILS. He squints like a bag of nails; i. e. his eyes are directed as many ways as the points of a bag of nails. The old BAG OF NAILS at Pimlico; originally the BACCHANALS.
BAYARD OF TEN TOES. To ride bayard of ten toes, is to
walk on foot. Bayard was a horse famous in old romances,BLANKET HORNPIPE. The amorous congress.
BODY OF DIVINITY BOUND IN BLACK CALF. A parson.
BORN UNDER A THREEPENNY HALFPENNY PLANET, NEVER TO BE WORTH A GROAT.
Said of any person remarkably unsuccessful in his attempts or
profession.TO BOX THE JESUIT, AND GET COCK ROACHES. A sea term for masturbation; a crime, it is said, much practised by the reverend fathers of that society.
BUTTOCK AND TONGUE. A scolding wife.
CHOAKING PYE, or COLD PYE, A punishment inflicted on any person sleeping in company: it consists in wrapping up cotton in a case or tube of paper, setting it on fire, and directing the smoke up the nostrils of the sleeper. See HOWELL’S COTGRAVE.
CHRISTMAS COMPLIMENTS. A cough, kibed heels, and a snotty nose.
COFFEE HOUSE. A necessary house. To make a coffee-house of a woman’s ****; to go in and out and spend nothing.
COLD PIG. To give cold pig is a punishment inflicted on sluggards who lie too long in bed: it consists in pulling off all the bed clothes from them, and throwing cold water upon them.
CORPORAL. To mount a corporal and four; to be guilty of onanism: the thumb is the corporal, the four fingers the privates.
And that’s just up to C.
(see also: The Internet was made for cussin’)
Project Gutenberg’s 1811 Dictionary in the Vulgar Tongue, by Francis Grose
(via Kottke)