To commemorate George Lucas’s long-awaited release of the original version of the first Star Wars trilogy, net-funnyguy Lore Sjöberg bats around some ideas for other box-sets that Lucas can mine our pockets with:
The 8-Year-Old Edition
One of the reasons thirtysomethings get so pissy about Lucas’ crimes against continuity is that what they really want is the original sense of wonder, joy and possibility that the movie instilled in them before a deadening, crushing world sucked it right back out again. This edition comes with a brain probe that turns you into an 8-year-old again, at least mentally. You’ll watch the entire movie with your mouth wide open, then you’ll run around the house making lightsaber noises during the credits. As an added bonus, if you apply the probe twice, you’ll turn into a 4-year-old, which will allow you to enjoy the jokes in The Phantom Menace.