For more than two decades, San Jose State University has held a contest honoring “bad opening sentences to imaginary novels.” This year’s winner of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest is Dan McKay, 43, from Fargo, North Dakota. The winning words:
As he stared at her ample bosom, he daydreamed of the dual Stromberg carburetors in his vintage Triumph Spitfire, highly functional yet pleasingly formed, perched prominently on top of the intake manifold, aching for experienced hands, the small knurled caps of the oil dampeners begging to be inspected and adjusted as described in chapter seven of the shop manual.
Link (Thanks, Mark Pescovitz!)