100 reasons abstinence is doomed

Cory Doctorow 12:42 am Sun Jan 25, 2004

Guideposts For Teens, a pro-abstinence org, has posted a list of 100 things for teens to do instead of savagely shagging one another. It is a very, very lame list.

6. Play hide-and-seek in a cornfield… (if a body meet a body comin' through the rye)

9. Pray together. (Jesus Jesus Jesus, don't stop)

10. Do a crossword puzzle… (What's a four-letter word for — oh, nevermind)

21. Watch your favorite Disney movie… (Dude, this is totally one of my major turn-ons)

34. Color eggs — even if it isn't Easter… (yes, that's right, encourage them to fetishize the reproductive cells of chickens)

100. Wash your parent's cars. (Ohhhhh, soapy t-shirts)

Link

(Thanks, justpat!)

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